So Long Insecurity Discussion - Week Three
I am so happy to report to you that the LORD has made Himself known to me in a powerful way this week! GOD is SO good!! He continues to refine me and confirm through His Word and others the things that He desires for me to learn through this study. I don't know about you, but this week of getting down in the dirt and digging up roots was not very easy. I felt like every point Beth made was screaming out my name!! Have you ever felt this way? It's kind of like when the preacher preaches on Sundays and you feel as though he has been a fly on the wall of your house the week before! LOL! (For me, the preacher actually had lived with me all week long!!) :) Praise God for His Spirit and His love. He loves us so much that His Spirit convicts our hearts when there is something that we need to change. He also helps us when there is something that we need to learn through His Word. Many times, He brings the same point up over and over until we realize that He is speaking directly to us! I'm so thankful that He doesn't give up on us.
Okay, let's get to our questions for this week. Please do not feel hesitant about answering. It is awesome to learn and study together. Many times what the Lord lays upon your heart will be a blessing to someone else. Let's not worry about if we are the best spellers or articulators, but just speak from your heart. It blesses me to hear from you!
Our questions this week, after reading Chapters 5 & 6, were the following:
1. After reading these two chapters, what do you believe to be the TWO primary roots of your struggle with insecurity? Keep in mind that more may apply but try to lock in on two that you believe to be most impactful.
2. What, if any, insight did you gain about the roots of insecurity and did you sense that God was trying to speak to you in any specific way through it? (This answer does not need to be limited to the two roots you identified in the previous response.)
My answers:
1. I believe that my two primary roots of my struggle with insecurity, at this stage of my life are dramatic change and rejection. As most of you know from our previous 40 day journey, this past few years has been one of dramatic change for me. I have had a hysterectomy, moved twice, seen my only child off to college and turned the big "40"!! This period of dramatic change has definitely been a root of my struggle with insecurity. I love what Beth said in Chapter 5. "The truth is, God uses change to change us. He doesn't use it to destroy us or to distract us but to coax us to the next level of character, experience, compassion, and destiny." I also loved the fact that she used mine and Tom's life verse, Philippians 1:6! What a blessed confirmation! God is committed to finishing what He started in us!
The other root had to do with rejection. I must agree that when we are rejected in any way, it causes us to question our personal value. These pages resonated within me as I read what Beth had to say about this deep root of insecurity. Sometimes we are outright rejected and sometimes it is a mere perception. When our hearts are wounded and tender, we can often perceive something as a total rejection, even if it is not. I could painfully identify with this truth. During times in our ministry, when we have been rejected, the pain was so great. This definitely causes a hypersensitivity to criticism and often causes you to take everything personal. Trust me; I have been there many times in the past 3 years! I can tell you that this is NO WAY to live!! Beloved, don't allow the enemy to keep you in a state of feeling worthless! Pray for healing and allow God to do some refining in your life. That is what He has been doing in mine! It is such a blessing when we realize that we are worth it! Christ loves us and HE felt that we were worth dying for. Sweet ones, believe this and know it is true!
2. I know and believe that God has been speaking clearly to my heart this week! I had the blessed opportunity to share with a friend some of the truths that God has taught me during this journey. I am so thankful that HE loves us and does not give up on us. I am the first to admit that I have been a perfect mess! :) I am also the first one to admit that God is doing a new work in my life. He is teaching me to look up to Him first and then to look into my heart. I want to move on and grow deeper with my Savior. I don't want to live in the past and I don't want to live feeling defeated. "We end up looking in to look up instead of looking up to look in. We get fixated on every self-gain and every self-loss until, in our inordinate self-production, we end up licking our wounds to the point that they can't heal." (pg. 105). Lord, search my heart! Help me to look to YOU and allow YOU to look in my heart. Show me the things that need to be changed and change me. YOU are the reason that I am here and YOU made me. I give YOU all the glory, honor and praise! Thank you Lord that I don't have to live with regrets. Thank you Lord that I don't have to live in the past. Thank you Lord that I don't have to live feeling defeated or worthless. I am victorious, chosen, redeemed, blessed, forgiven and loved by YOU, O Lord. I love you Jesus!
Journey Girls,
I just want you to know how very much you are loved! You are worth it! You are such a blessing to me! Thank you for joining me in this quest for security. God is teaching us some wonderful truths in His Word and He loves us so very much! He is not finished with us! Continue to look to Him. He is telling you that you are worth pursuing, loving, fighting for and keeping!
"Being confident of this, that HE who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus!" ~ Philippians 1:6
I love you,
Elisabeth
Okay, let's get to our questions for this week. Please do not feel hesitant about answering. It is awesome to learn and study together. Many times what the Lord lays upon your heart will be a blessing to someone else. Let's not worry about if we are the best spellers or articulators, but just speak from your heart. It blesses me to hear from you!
Our questions this week, after reading Chapters 5 & 6, were the following:
1. After reading these two chapters, what do you believe to be the TWO primary roots of your struggle with insecurity? Keep in mind that more may apply but try to lock in on two that you believe to be most impactful.
2. What, if any, insight did you gain about the roots of insecurity and did you sense that God was trying to speak to you in any specific way through it? (This answer does not need to be limited to the two roots you identified in the previous response.)
My answers:
1. I believe that my two primary roots of my struggle with insecurity, at this stage of my life are dramatic change and rejection. As most of you know from our previous 40 day journey, this past few years has been one of dramatic change for me. I have had a hysterectomy, moved twice, seen my only child off to college and turned the big "40"!! This period of dramatic change has definitely been a root of my struggle with insecurity. I love what Beth said in Chapter 5. "The truth is, God uses change to change us. He doesn't use it to destroy us or to distract us but to coax us to the next level of character, experience, compassion, and destiny." I also loved the fact that she used mine and Tom's life verse, Philippians 1:6! What a blessed confirmation! God is committed to finishing what He started in us!
The other root had to do with rejection. I must agree that when we are rejected in any way, it causes us to question our personal value. These pages resonated within me as I read what Beth had to say about this deep root of insecurity. Sometimes we are outright rejected and sometimes it is a mere perception. When our hearts are wounded and tender, we can often perceive something as a total rejection, even if it is not. I could painfully identify with this truth. During times in our ministry, when we have been rejected, the pain was so great. This definitely causes a hypersensitivity to criticism and often causes you to take everything personal. Trust me; I have been there many times in the past 3 years! I can tell you that this is NO WAY to live!! Beloved, don't allow the enemy to keep you in a state of feeling worthless! Pray for healing and allow God to do some refining in your life. That is what He has been doing in mine! It is such a blessing when we realize that we are worth it! Christ loves us and HE felt that we were worth dying for. Sweet ones, believe this and know it is true!
2. I know and believe that God has been speaking clearly to my heart this week! I had the blessed opportunity to share with a friend some of the truths that God has taught me during this journey. I am so thankful that HE loves us and does not give up on us. I am the first to admit that I have been a perfect mess! :) I am also the first one to admit that God is doing a new work in my life. He is teaching me to look up to Him first and then to look into my heart. I want to move on and grow deeper with my Savior. I don't want to live in the past and I don't want to live feeling defeated. "We end up looking in to look up instead of looking up to look in. We get fixated on every self-gain and every self-loss until, in our inordinate self-production, we end up licking our wounds to the point that they can't heal." (pg. 105). Lord, search my heart! Help me to look to YOU and allow YOU to look in my heart. Show me the things that need to be changed and change me. YOU are the reason that I am here and YOU made me. I give YOU all the glory, honor and praise! Thank you Lord that I don't have to live with regrets. Thank you Lord that I don't have to live in the past. Thank you Lord that I don't have to live feeling defeated or worthless. I am victorious, chosen, redeemed, blessed, forgiven and loved by YOU, O Lord. I love you Jesus!
Journey Girls,
I just want you to know how very much you are loved! You are worth it! You are such a blessing to me! Thank you for joining me in this quest for security. God is teaching us some wonderful truths in His Word and He loves us so very much! He is not finished with us! Continue to look to Him. He is telling you that you are worth pursuing, loving, fighting for and keeping!
"Being confident of this, that HE who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus!" ~ Philippians 1:6
I love you,
Elisabeth
2 Response to So Long Insecurity Discussion - Week Three
Well I believe looking back on my life, my parents did not have the best of a relationship. Both of my parents worked, which I understand that there are times both have to work. But I don't really remember much about my childhood, there isn't really any wonderful memories. I just remember there not really being a great relationship between them. I remember coming home to a empty house a lot, or my sister would be in charge, which she hated me. So I found solitude in a neighbor, which soon became my best friend, which I might add she was not a Christian at that time. So the influence was not all that great. The my parents divorced at the age of 11. So it went from bad to worse. They both remarried very shortly after. So the ups and downs of my parents when I was little was not very helpful in my self-esteem or securities.
The other thing i give merit to my insecurities is,my first marriage was a nightmare. He lied to me and faked his walk with God just to get me to marry him. Even though he never had intentions of walking with God. But he knew how important it was to me, he had been a friend for a long time before. He convinced me to break off a perfectly wonderful relationship with someone, that I still feel horrible about. He then decided after only being married for a few months, he went into basic for the air force. While he was there he had his first affair. I was not completly sure about it, it was just a feeling I had, which now I realize that God was telling me. But I decided to give him a chance, because he denied it. So off we go to North Dakota. We had been married for about two years we had our baby girl, Emily. Emily was about 3 months old and he decide the stress was to great of trying to live a fake life for me and have a baby that he had his second affair. I didn't find out about all the affairs until Emily was about 6 months old. So about 1 year later we were divorced. So I guess those are the two reasons I can give credit to why I face insecurities.
2.
Well I think the main thing that God is showing me is that I need to see myself the way He does. I need to love myself and love what God is doing in my life regardless of what other people my think. I can not allow my past to control how I feel about myself. Or control the decisions I make in my future. I need to see that I was beautifully and wonderfully created in Gods own image, and that I am disrespecting God if I do not respect myself.
Thank you so much Elisabeth for doing this book, I have enjoyed it so much. I have found myself sharing with other women already about this book and what it is doing in my life. And encouraging them to read it.
Tammy,
Thank you so much for sharing your heart! I am so sorry for the past hurts in your life! I am so thankful that you are doing this study with me and I know that the Lord is going to teach us so much together with Him. I can very much relate to what you said about God seeing us the way He does. I am learning this important fact as well. I am enjoying this study also and I pray that the Lord uses it in many lives. I just want other women to see themselves through the eyes of a loving Savior!! Our Abba, Daddy, loves us so very much and yes, He thinks we are beautiful. I am praying for you. I love you so much and you are a beautiful woman of God!! :)
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