So Long Insecurity - Discussion Week One
Journey Girls,
What a blessed week in the LORD!! I just have to tell you that the LORD continues to make Himself known to me in mighty ways this week! GOD is SO good! Still no news on the church front, but Tom and I continue to pray and seek God's face. I am so anxious to be a part of our next ministry, but I must say that I am enjoying having so much time to spend with my Savior each day. It has been wonderful! I am also so excited to be in this book study with each of you! I ask for your patience, as I have never done an "online" book study. We will learn together! (with Beth Moore, of course!) I know that God has awesome insights for us to learn.
I just wanted to share a quick note of "family talk!" I want to encourage you to continue to stay in God's Word each day, even as we continue in a book study together. Beth will bring God's Word in her book, but this in no way is a substitute for our time in His Word. Continue to stay in the Word and spend time in prayer and commution with Jesus each day! Also, remember that our JG Prayer Closet is still open. Use it whenever you have a prayer need or praise to share with the rest of the Journey Girls! Let's keep on praying for each other and encouraging each other as we journey on in our spiritual walk with Christ. I love you girls so much and appreciate your continued support and prayers! YOU ARE AWESOME!
Let's review our homework questions from our first week's assignment that Beth gave us. Please feel free to comment below. I would love to hear how God spoke to your heart this week. Remember that you can click on Beth's book to the right to go directly to her blog site and read comments from others doing this book study.
Homework from week #1 of "So Long Insecurity": We were asked to read the first two chapters of "So Long Insecurity" and answer the following questions. . .
Question 1: When was the last time you came face-to-face with our gender's massive struggle with insecurity? Describe the setting.
Question 2: What part of the definition or description of insecurity resonated most with you and why?
Okay, I am going to be the first to answer these questions as open and honest as I know how. I must admit that some of what I read this past week was stingingly painful and eye opening for me! Here it goes. . .
1) I came face-to-face with insecurity recently when I went to visit my little sister last month. I went to church with her and her sweet husband on Sunday. I have to admit that I was already feeling gross about myself. As I told you before, turning 40 has made me very aware of my age, each time I look in the mirror! I am 12 1/2 years older than my little sister. At church that day, someone asked if I was her mother!!! I must say, this did nothing for my self esteem. I was already feeling like I looked "old" and this statement did not help matters! Why must people always feel the need to say what is on their mind? Why does society always put pressure on us to look a certain way? Why do we feel as though we can age, but our looks must stay the same as they were when we were 18? Ugh! Anyway, I have to tell you that the enemy continues to remind me of this statement daily. Every time I look in the mirror, I am reminded that someone thought I was old enough to be my sister's mother! I desperately want to get past this and get rid of insecurity all together!
Lord, help me to cling to 1 Samuel 16:7b, "The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." Create in me a clean, pure heart. Help me to seek your face and to not let words of those around me hinder me. Help me to see myself as a daughter of the Most High! I love you Jesus!
2) I am ashamed to admit that the definition of insecurity resonated with every part of my being! I struggle with self-doubt, worth, and self-consciousness. Yes, I am one insecure girl! I used to laugh with my Women's Ministry Team, when I would have to speak or pray in front of our congregation. I told them that people did not know that when I was a little girl, I was shy and did not want to be in the lime light. I clung to my Momma's leg and hid behind her each week as she greeted people at church. I was a pastor's daughter, but despised being the center of attention. I didn't even want my picture taken. Wow, did God ever push me out of my comfort zone! Little did I know, that He would call me to marry a pastor and I would be in the lime light, whether I wanted to or not. A pastor's family in many ways, lives in a "fishbowl" and they are always being looked at and evaluated. As I grew in my relationship with the LORD, He began to do a work in my life. He began to use me to facilitate small groups, speak to women and to pray on Sunday mornings at church. I remember telling our Administrative Pastor that I would pray, if he would allow me to have a microphone at my seat. I didn't want to have to be up front. He agreed and I began to pray. Well, 2 1/2 years ago, we moved to another church and I was asked to pray by the worship pastor. I said I would because I wanted to be obedient to the Holy Spirit. Later, my husband and I received much criticism. One of the things we were criticized for was how he preached and how I prayed. I was so deeply wounded. This is an area that I already felt insecure, and this just magnified the point. I have not prayed in front of a group of people since that time. I desperately want to put this behind me. Please pray with me. I just want to be used of God, whenever and wherever HE sees fit to use me.
Thanks for your patience and understanding with me. Thank you for allowing me to share my heart. Now, it's your turn. Please do not feel like you have to comment, but I would love to hear your heart. Sometimes, when we open our hearts and share with honesty, we allow GOD to pour some healing balm on our wounds.
I am praying for you and praying for God to open our hearts and reveal the things that HE desires to speak to us during this study. Allow Him to open our eyes, ears and heart to what He wants to show us. I will post tomorrow's assignment in the morning, after Beth has posted the instructions.
I love, love, love you Journey Girls!
Elisabeth
What a blessed week in the LORD!! I just have to tell you that the LORD continues to make Himself known to me in mighty ways this week! GOD is SO good! Still no news on the church front, but Tom and I continue to pray and seek God's face. I am so anxious to be a part of our next ministry, but I must say that I am enjoying having so much time to spend with my Savior each day. It has been wonderful! I am also so excited to be in this book study with each of you! I ask for your patience, as I have never done an "online" book study. We will learn together! (with Beth Moore, of course!) I know that God has awesome insights for us to learn.
I just wanted to share a quick note of "family talk!" I want to encourage you to continue to stay in God's Word each day, even as we continue in a book study together. Beth will bring God's Word in her book, but this in no way is a substitute for our time in His Word. Continue to stay in the Word and spend time in prayer and commution with Jesus each day! Also, remember that our JG Prayer Closet is still open. Use it whenever you have a prayer need or praise to share with the rest of the Journey Girls! Let's keep on praying for each other and encouraging each other as we journey on in our spiritual walk with Christ. I love you girls so much and appreciate your continued support and prayers! YOU ARE AWESOME!
Let's review our homework questions from our first week's assignment that Beth gave us. Please feel free to comment below. I would love to hear how God spoke to your heart this week. Remember that you can click on Beth's book to the right to go directly to her blog site and read comments from others doing this book study.
Homework from week #1 of "So Long Insecurity": We were asked to read the first two chapters of "So Long Insecurity" and answer the following questions. . .
Question 1: When was the last time you came face-to-face with our gender's massive struggle with insecurity? Describe the setting.
Question 2: What part of the definition or description of insecurity resonated most with you and why?
Okay, I am going to be the first to answer these questions as open and honest as I know how. I must admit that some of what I read this past week was stingingly painful and eye opening for me! Here it goes. . .
1) I came face-to-face with insecurity recently when I went to visit my little sister last month. I went to church with her and her sweet husband on Sunday. I have to admit that I was already feeling gross about myself. As I told you before, turning 40 has made me very aware of my age, each time I look in the mirror! I am 12 1/2 years older than my little sister. At church that day, someone asked if I was her mother!!! I must say, this did nothing for my self esteem. I was already feeling like I looked "old" and this statement did not help matters! Why must people always feel the need to say what is on their mind? Why does society always put pressure on us to look a certain way? Why do we feel as though we can age, but our looks must stay the same as they were when we were 18? Ugh! Anyway, I have to tell you that the enemy continues to remind me of this statement daily. Every time I look in the mirror, I am reminded that someone thought I was old enough to be my sister's mother! I desperately want to get past this and get rid of insecurity all together!
Lord, help me to cling to 1 Samuel 16:7b, "The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." Create in me a clean, pure heart. Help me to seek your face and to not let words of those around me hinder me. Help me to see myself as a daughter of the Most High! I love you Jesus!
2) I am ashamed to admit that the definition of insecurity resonated with every part of my being! I struggle with self-doubt, worth, and self-consciousness. Yes, I am one insecure girl! I used to laugh with my Women's Ministry Team, when I would have to speak or pray in front of our congregation. I told them that people did not know that when I was a little girl, I was shy and did not want to be in the lime light. I clung to my Momma's leg and hid behind her each week as she greeted people at church. I was a pastor's daughter, but despised being the center of attention. I didn't even want my picture taken. Wow, did God ever push me out of my comfort zone! Little did I know, that He would call me to marry a pastor and I would be in the lime light, whether I wanted to or not. A pastor's family in many ways, lives in a "fishbowl" and they are always being looked at and evaluated. As I grew in my relationship with the LORD, He began to do a work in my life. He began to use me to facilitate small groups, speak to women and to pray on Sunday mornings at church. I remember telling our Administrative Pastor that I would pray, if he would allow me to have a microphone at my seat. I didn't want to have to be up front. He agreed and I began to pray. Well, 2 1/2 years ago, we moved to another church and I was asked to pray by the worship pastor. I said I would because I wanted to be obedient to the Holy Spirit. Later, my husband and I received much criticism. One of the things we were criticized for was how he preached and how I prayed. I was so deeply wounded. This is an area that I already felt insecure, and this just magnified the point. I have not prayed in front of a group of people since that time. I desperately want to put this behind me. Please pray with me. I just want to be used of God, whenever and wherever HE sees fit to use me.
Thanks for your patience and understanding with me. Thank you for allowing me to share my heart. Now, it's your turn. Please do not feel like you have to comment, but I would love to hear your heart. Sometimes, when we open our hearts and share with honesty, we allow GOD to pour some healing balm on our wounds.
I am praying for you and praying for God to open our hearts and reveal the things that HE desires to speak to us during this study. Allow Him to open our eyes, ears and heart to what He wants to show us. I will post tomorrow's assignment in the morning, after Beth has posted the instructions.
I love, love, love you Journey Girls!
Elisabeth
6 Response to So Long Insecurity - Discussion Week One
OK, I haven't had a chance to read my chapters yet as I still struggle to juggle everything right now but tonight at youth we were participating in an activity where we had to talk to different people and ask different questions. One of the questions was what grade are you in. I was talking to one of the boys and when I asked him that question he said, 10th grade and my dad and Peter went to high school together. I instantly realized that I was old enough to have a child that was a sophomore in high school. YIKES! I remember when we were first in the ministry and only 22 years old. Times flies and now all of a sudden I am old enough to be their parent. Talk about feeling insecure in what we do! I had to stop what I was doing and remind myself it is not about how old you are but how old you act! Each day when a insecurity arises I have to stop and leave it with Him.
Christy,
I know you have SO much on you right now and I want you to know that I am praying for you! Thank you for your support and for sharing your heart! :) I appreciate you! NO WORRIES!! You will get caught up. Praying for your girls weekend and know that I love you so much!!
Love,
Elisabeth
I think I could be the "COVER GIRL" for insecurities!! I have been on a diet since I went from formula to solid foods at whatever age that was, 2 years old... Anybody that is overweight, knows how insecure it makes you feel. I keep asking myself, when are these feelings ever going to leave,and will they leave for good!! Will this ever happen? These insecurities has affected every part of my life, from family relationships, to friendships, to romantic relationships!! It has basically come to the point, of almost complete isolation, which is okay with me!! (I guess!!)
It's funny as I had this conversation with a friend about insecurities. Of course, I get to hear again, but Beth you have the greatest personality, you are so nice, and have the sweetest smile. I so badly want to scream at them and say "and BLAH! BLAH! BLAH!!"
This has affected me throughout my entire life. I'm always thinking people will like and/or love me, if I look this way, if I have this or that, go here or there, have a great house or car. I am 44, my body is extremely scarred from numerous surgerys, it has caused emotional scarring, numerous addictions and I could go on and on and on, but I will spare you!! However, I am so relieved that I am not the only woman whom has these feelings, but I share with thousands.
Elisabeth, you shared about your desire to have more children. I can empathize with you. I have never shared this with anyone, but I have always wanted a child, but I could never be involved in a relationship that I would not sabotage or that would become so unhealthy, that things would always fizzle out. (Pretty sick, don't you think!!) I guess it's totally out of the question now, that I am 44 (way to old) and having a hysterectomy last week.
My relationship with Christ has made things better, however, I feel so unworthy.... I find that when I am not in "HIS WORD", these feelings come back full force. God definitely answers prayers, because in the last two years people and things have always popped up at the right time. I "PRAISE HIM" for these blessings!! (and I don't have a clue if answered the questions appropriately).
I am answering these questions as the final hour of my 45th birthday winds to a close. Oh how I wish I could say that after 45 years, I am a secure woman, but I think I struggle with insecurity more and more as time goes by. Honestly, I think I have started a new diet every single day of my life since I was about 12 years old. I cannot remember ever in my life being able to look into a mirror and be happy with what I saw. How sad is that?? It makes me uncomfortable to even admit that out loud. The typical response I have usually gotten, especially from my husband is, "Why do you feel that way? You aren't fat." That drives me crazy!!! I desperately wish that I could see myself with someone else's eyes...I am praying that through this book study, maybe I can learn to see God's eyes...
Let's see, which definition of insecurity fits me best: I would have to go with chronic self-consciousness. Why does looks matter so much?? I don't think about it constantly, but when I am out somewhere I always end up having to go
to the bathroom and one of those vicious mirrors hits me every time. Forget banning smoking from public places...I think they should ban mirrors!!
Beth,
THANK YOU SO MUCH for sharing!! I appreciate your honesty and your sweet spirit! I am so happy that you are doing this book study with me. You are so dear to me and I love and appreciate you so very much! YOU are beautiful! (inside and out). Thank you for your friendship. We will continue to grow closer to Jesus together and we ARE going to put these insecurities behind us once and for all!!
Love you!
Rhonda,
First of all, let me just say that you DO NOT look 45 years old!! You are so beautiful! I appreciate you so much and thank you for your honesty and for sharing! I understand your feelings more than you can imagine. I love you idea of banning mirrors!! :) That is awesome! I love you Rhonda and you are in my prayers. As I told Beth, we are going to get through this study with a real sense of who we are in Jesus Christ and put these insecurities behind us once and for all!! Happy Birthday (again!) . . . remember, it is still your birthday month!! :)
Love you!
Post a Comment